Monday, March 29, 2010

Herpes-The new Black?



So I heard this statistic that says, at this rate, in 500 years(or so), natural blonds will be extinct do to it's recessive genic traits. So I have a statistic. I say at this rate, eventually everyone will have herpes. Herpes isn't the worst-plus on a long enough time line...I could image something like "9 in every 10 people have herpes." It becomes a totally normal thing that some people have to deal with, and that 1 in 10 that don't have it will have to just be careful.

I think in the future if this DOES happened, it's up to hollywood and the media to save it. It's inevitable that some celeb of the future with contract herpes(probly Miley Cyrus) and make it the "cool new thing". He or she will be crowned "Avant guarde" and lead a revolution! Making herpes "the new black".

Unless there's a cure for this rather comedic STD, I think this is a pretty good hypothesis. I mean, I don't have herpes but when and if I ever contract herpes, I'd hope I don't have to be bummed on it forever! So that's why I'm leaving it up to the world to make herpes the hot new style of 2000whatever. You can do it! Make herpes the hot new fashion trend that all the cool kids are rockin'!

Friday, March 26, 2010

Happy Birthday to ME!






So today is my birthday!

Sigh..

Okay, so this year I didn't want to make crazy demands/have a crazy kegger/flatbar fiesta or whatever. I guess I'm just goin with the flow! I'm writing this now at 12 am be cause I'm confident by 12 pm I'll be incoherent.

Man.. All I really wanted was to go out to dinner with my parents and have people write happy birthday on my facebook wall...which I really appreciate by the way. To be honest I was a little nervous as to whether a lot of people would write happy birthday or not! It's my guilt for never writing it on peoples walls when it's their birthday. I'm not vain and self centered-I swear!

So yeah-no crazy demands... However if I where to make wild demands...the list might look something like this:

-A beautifully tailored skinny suit from top man.
-A lap dance from a super hot stripper.
-for creed/hinder/puddle of mud to stop making music.
-to have that old red mini van I used to drive around.
-a nice cute compact car(Jetta,civic,prius)
-a super awesome date with this girl I'm crushing on dumb hard at school.
-a Starbucks gift card
-a pedicure
-a gay bestfriend-sike. (gay bff part 3 coming soon)
-longer hair
-an acid/shrooms experience

-an apartment in elmhurst queens with my homie sam.
-for there to be a target on every block.
-for youjizz.com to turn there background back to white.
-a fake ID
-to be more handsome
-to abolish the notion of blackmail
-visit California where hopefully I haven't/will never be forgotten.
-be able to jump over a trash can standing up on my skateboard.
-have a beard.
-get Conan back on TV!
-raise George Carlin from the dead.
-eat more hummus then I already do
-A nice fixed gear bike
-go to a mets game
-get good at skateboarding
-be included in an art show
-have more people read my blog
-make gifttotheworld.com
-meet Alexi Wasser and ask her out
-a nice pair of shoes-I like the Reider2 from gravis.
-to have my grandma live to see my children.
-Dinner at a fancy restaurant
-to get really into wine and go to napa valley and know what I'm talking about.
-for ALL bathroom stall doors to have hooks for hanging your shit.
-for the I pad to have a camera for iChat-that would sell me on it.
-a nice pair of tight shiny black pants.
-to see the strokes play live.
-the world to stop being at war and to really do something about the environment!

I could probably think of a million more!

(now its morning)

So I wake up this morning to all these HAPPY BIRTHDAYs on my FB wall and you know what? Today IS sorta special! thanks for letting me know! You are all important people who have affected my life in on way or another. I love writing this blog and its my gift to all of you! The world!

I love you! thanks for everything and making this morning unlike the rest!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

and interesting condition

A Fasinating guy-Donald Lee.

the video pretty much sums it up. ladies and gents, the Donald Lee interview! uncut and unscripted.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

MYpod playlist



My go-to playlist for the past few weeks.

I am so on point.



I'm really rather sharp as a tack as of late. On Sunday I hit up one of my fave spots-AKA TARGET, with my momz and picked up some essentials. If you don't own one already, I Urge you to go pick up an electric tooth brush! You have not known clean till you have owned and oral-B vitality! And I swear I wasn't payed to write that-it's that compelling!

I also got my hands on some new facial wash that i'm excited about. I had a great time exploring hair product as well. I picked up some hair spray that promises to make me hot or something-we'll see how that turns out. My scalpes been flakin a little-got that head & shoulders, no big D. Um what else did I get? Oo yeah! Fresh pack of fruit of the loom boxer breifs-extra tight/just how I like-holla!

That's what I love about target, you can totally be shopping for a million things all at once. It's like the hip fashionable K-mart. No doubt Target is the shit!

I'm just feelin good right now! Like I'm ready for anything. Earlier today I finished a project for school that I was particularly proud of. It's 4 am right now and I've got a big presentation to do on it tommorrow, what's wrong with me! I was gonna go to bed but then my dad got me an early birthday present and that Kept me up for a few hours. He got me one of those speakers/radio/iPod dock/player/music things. I fucking love it, it's the best! I have the best dad ever foreal-I'm his best friends. Which reminds me, he wants me to Make him a face book account-how cute is that?!?!

So anywayz, I get this great new present and it's so awesome looking, it brings my attention to what a mess my room has become! This new device had inspired me to make my room clean/neat and organized. I'm so excited now, all my clothes are neatly folder and sorted. I hope I can keep it this way, I definently prefer a clean living space.

I feel happy and confident and ready for whatever the world has to throw at me. Shouldn't we all get to feel this way always?

Sunday, March 21, 2010

The huge dick you never had.

[Your inner Tyler Durden will thank you]


Jesus Christ! Can I stress it anymore? Confidence is everything! I know you've heard it enough times and may think it's too vague to even help you-but get off your ass and do some research. Confidence is a key components that make the great freaking amazing.

Is this a rant? Yes!

Guys. You need to find your inner confidence. When you're sulking in the corner cause you think your penis is small or something-everyone can sense this-as if you where letting off your our fragrance of "cock block". Girls know when you are comfortable and confident-it's primal.

When you have the courage to be who you want to be-all those around you will respect you. You will be straight forward, call it like it is, be funny, make girls wet etc. I'm serious! And not just making all this up-I promise.

When you are ultimate/boss, smart intelligent things will fountain from you're mouth. You will look your best(always) and not let anyone rain on your parade! You will make all those around you happy and lucky to know you, never be awkward and get invited to awesome parties where you will meet awesome people worthy of your presence.

Carry this further into the bedroom and well you will arrive-only after her.

If you can have this all figured out-your life will be a load easier. By no means am I suggesting my own mastery of this art-however I would wonder how Napoleon would of conquered Europe without this element. So friend-ponder this as you admire jealously in private to the lady killers and conquerors a like.

Goodday

PS. that fine line between confidence and kanye west. That could be A rant for another day. This one goes out to all the herbs!

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Alliance skateshop Opening party/extravaganza!

As I'm posting this the fun is still yet to come. after parties left and right-this is gonna be a crazy weekend. for the first time in months its warmer in NY then LA-we got tho suckaz BEAT.

these are Some photos on my phone from this epic day. The opening of Alliance Skateshop in flushing queens! One of the Owners of the shop-aclose friend-Eddie vargas Threw a great event for the skate community of northern queens. great turn-Bros-and a friendly Game Of Skate contest that any one could enter.

Taking first place was the homie Evan Borja-second place went to marsh-3rd to the homie Travis. Great job guys!

EDDIE-BEST OF LUCK TO YOU And the shop. you have every reason to succeed and I admire your ambishion and drive. You are doing a great thing for your skate community and everyone appreciates your contribution.






Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The new look


There is a beauty in symetry. When I broke my right arm about two months ago, my symetry was disrupted. Fast forward to now and I have a gimpy/ephialtes from 300/'good arm' from scary movie/skinny shit right arm and a jacked/vin diesel/chuck norris left arm. For the past few months my left arms been doin all the heavy lifting-I could see how it all came about.

So now I'm thinkin-hey, this jacked cut-ass arm doesn't look too bad, what if I could get this goin on through out my body? And so the journey begins.

I really never thought I would say this, but I wanna be totally ripped! Not like meat head/steroid/'where did my neck go!' brawlic. Ew nasty gross, who would ever want that. No. I was thinking more along the lines of Bruce Lee or Brad Pitt in fight club. That could work right? Don't get me wrong, the skinny emo/hipster/looking like a fag/weakling look is totally rad and all, I'm just thinking perhaps I could put a cool spin on muscles! I mean, muscles are cool you know?



[I sound like such a jock]

I suppose I'm revamping the the image a little, why stop at muscles! Has anyone at all been wondering about my hair? Course not, why would you-it's MY hair. So anywhoo-right now I'm trying to grow this bad boy out, mean while visiting some awkward stages in between. I'm sure I had a mullet at some point.. Then a bob-cut.. Pony tail mode.. The list goes on.

My goal at this point is to get my hair long and hippy status, like Saul played by James franco in pineapple express. Then when I've reached that goal I may linger their for a week or so before I get the Casablanca-by Julian Casablanca of the strokes. This du is basically long to medium length with ragged bangs. I suppose when I get sick of that I will make my way down to the ever popular greaser/slick-back/dylan rieder/RVCA skate team du that's huge right now in skateboarding.

Phase 1
Phase 2
Phase 3
Ultimately once I've lived all my dream hair cuts I plan to go bald or next to bald. At that point I'd feel that any insecurity I may of had about my hair in the past may at last be put to rest...

...or some deep shit like that.

Boy I have alot to write about hair/myself. Summary? Get ripped and have great hair.



Sunday, March 14, 2010

up for discussion



These are some of my new friends I met this semester at school, Erica and Melissa. Totally great chatting with them-I only wish I could of captured some of the more raunchy conversation peices!

they're great, if you're ever in the soho area, drop by the volcom store where perhaps either of the 2 may be working.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Just my type: Camilla Belle




It's so obvious that I would be in love with her. When I told a friend of mine that I was gonna do a 'just my type' on her, she smugly replied "hahaha you would" . Fair enough. now allow me to elaboarate on this goddess I have deemed suitable for my means-hwahaha!

I'm a simple creature. Basically if an interview of someone exists-and I am lured to read it-and enjoyed reading it, I will love that person(maybe forever). Thus the case for the beautiful Camilla Belle, of which I read of in a Nylon from sometime last year.



Shall we Examine Exhibit A. the eye brows. I am in love with them. They work so well on her-I really wouldnt have it any other way. Her brow clearly rivals that of Joe Jonas. If they stayed together and had a kid, when that kid got old he probly woulda look something like the dad from the OC(Sandy Cohen-do your research). It's weird you know, I feel like Camilla and Joe Jonas are very simular and on par with each other. I would imagine guy feel as lusted towards Camilla Belle as teenage/middle american/normy/white girls would towards Joe. Kinda get what I'm saying?

This girl deffinently strikes a chord in me. I recognize something in her that is beyond a pretty face.

Sigh*

What a babe.


Tuesday, March 9, 2010

video blogging begins now.



I made a commercial? sorta.
i made a video post!

Saturday, March 6, 2010

The girl I'm obsessed with



Judge me as you will.

Months ago was when I first heard of her. maybe I saw a picture or something. Whatever it was, she was brought to my attention. I've never formally met her, however I know as much as her facebook profile will tell me.

Yes. I'm a total creep. I've looked at all 1000+ profile/tagged/album pictures. I've read what she writes and occasional what others right to her. I do not check up on her daily, only when she comes to mind. This may be once or twice a month.

No, I don't have a shrine to her. No, I don't camp outsider her house. No, I don't stalk her. It's 2010, we keep folders full of pictures we like of the person we're obsessed with, she is no exception. She is beautiful.

I've been "obsessed" now for maybe a year. In this past year I've seen her in person 3 time, all of chance encounter. We roam the same parts of lower manhattan and even have mutual friends, it would only be a matter of time. The times I've seen her I was from a far. I've never spoken to her, yet I would recognize her face. When I see her I won't do anything, just take mental note. "that is her" I say to myself, and continue off.

Am I revealing too much? Or is this sounding familiar to you? No one needs to know...except you. What is the nature of our generation. To be stand-offish and criticize others for being animate of their desires and motivations?

Why am I revealing my nature?

Because maybe she will see this. Maybe she will read this. Maybe she'll even be flattered. What should I be afraid of? That she might get a glimpes into my soul and think badly of me? Then she's not for me. Simple as that. I would hope that I don't come across as a threat but instead a harmless admirer.

It's not like me to leave things up to chance when I know the odds aren't great. What I'm writing now you could say is my lottery ticket.

Jonn

Friday, March 5, 2010

A story to tell


I try to write every day, and post something every day if not every other day. A friend of mine, Ceasar Borja, broke down my blog theme into a simple formula.

hot-sexy-awesome girls want hot-sexy-awesome boys. period.

Hot is obvious. Sexy is-duh. And awesome is, up to you to define. People will recognize awesome when you've achieved it.

When you break it down into just that it kinda makes it hard to post new stuff. I mean, how much can you really write about hot girls/wakk guys/gay friends? enough to get me this far.

So its not like i pull story out of my ass. It comes from life. When you live, its not hard to have a story to tell.

So go out/interact/stop being shy. Have a fucking story to tell me when I meet you.

Check back tomorrow, I'll have an interesting story to tell.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Just My Type: Dylan Rieder

Better late then never! Without further blabbering, this is Dylan Rieder!



So a couple weeks back there was a Gravis demo at KCDC. I knew I NEEDED to be there since the Illusive Dylan rieder would show. So when I finally got to see him for the second time... It was alright... yeah(fucking)right! I fucking melted! Me and every women withing a 5 mile radius!

Besides being da domb pro skater, hes also a total style icon. Pioneering the male "tunic" or whatever you want to call it, Dylan seriously pushes the limits of fashion. I would describe his fashion sense as Taylor swift meets GQ. not getting a sense of what that is? thats Dylan, a totally unique style-on and off his board.

Ps.
Its been hectic, more posts soon!